27 More Blog Spam Comments for a Hearty Laugh
Welcome to the fourth installment of our featured spam comment series (check out parts one, two, and three here)! If you’ve ever wondered what blog spam looks like on a promotional products blog, then you’re in luck.
It’s not unusual for us to field hundreds of junk comments a day, but the past couple months have been insane: We’ve been raking them in by the thousands.
Here they are! Some of them are the oddest, WTF-inducing ones I’ve seen to date:
Good lord! You took the time to comment on our blog even when a big fuzzy thing was trying to kill you? That’s dedication. Also, your last sentence could actually be a decent opening line for a novel…
99 years in prison for potty training problems? Isn’t that somewhat harsh? And where does one even get a free cheetah skin?
Okay, here’s your first problem: You can’t start a blog on a yearbook. I’m also concerned that you vaporized before you could finish your last sentence. Are you okay? Give me a sign!
I don’t know if I’m more taken aback that only 12 children were exposed to the pox in Europe or that Rosacea headache can apparently pass it to others. Either way, what does this have to do with anything?
Where did you say you found our blog? I don’t think I caught that. And you be careful for brussels, too.
Sweet! I love enormous thumbs!
I don’t understand what you’re asking.
You do know that punctuation requires a space after it, right? Guess not.
Wow, okay, Mr. Sassy Pants. I had no idea you were so passionate about reading.
I… What? I am both disturbed and sad right now…
Now that’s talent. I’d like to see that! Wait, no. Nevermind.
You probably meant the bookmarking site, but the closeness of the words “delicious” and “sweat” creep me out quite a bit.
Aw, thank you! This is the nicest spam comment I’ve ever received. Now I feel like I can do anything.
I’d like to make it known that this comment appeared on a blog about a promo item sale. Inspirational? Perhaps. But still completely irrelevant.
Seems like you ran out of words there. Want to try again?
Let me get this straight. You’re blaming your parents for the treatment and now you’re downloading it from the webpage? Huh?
I don’t even need to comment here. You’ve already made the point. Please, read something once in a while.
HAHAHAHA! You’re hilarious! My answer is NO.
Um, I guess?
Oh man, I’m going to start using the phrase “illegally cute kid” and see if anyone calls me out on it. Your lack of consistency amuses me, too. I love the random sniff in the middle and the cereal tips at the end! But all in all, I couldn’t give a rats preverbial about you.
Did you really just give grammar and punctuation advice? Really? I’ll get right on that.
Hello, kavin. Happy to help you on your spammy adventure.
Tell me about it! That internet-site filling velocity is, in fact, unbelievable. It’s out of control, am I right?
I hope they mentioned the sprinkled hammocks in the amenities. More people should know about those!
I’m not a Kenyan marathoner, so no need to scholarhip me any tricks.
Anyone else remember the clip from The Office when Michael Scott asks Toby, “Why are you the way that you are?” That’s what this comment brought to mind. Michael, are you reading this?
Well, that’s all I scrounged up for right now! Thanks for reading this edition of our spam comment ridicule blog! Come back next time and read a few more.
Which one of these comments puzzled you the most? Did you get any novel ideas from them? Did you understand any of them? Let me know in the comments!
Image credit to schoschie on Flickr.
Jill has been obsessed with words since her fingers could turn the pages of a book. She’s a hopeless bibliophile who recently purchased a Kindle after almost 6 years of radical opposition, and she loves stumbling upon new music on Pandora. Random interests include (but are not limited to) bookstores, movie memorabilia, and adorable rodents. Jill writes for the QLP blog and assists with the company’s social media accounts. You can connect with Jill on Google+.